Sunday, February 16, 2014

Rules About Love And Life Made Over Drinks

During one of our many get together over another bucket of beer, me and my single lady friends started this list (and still growing list) of rules based on our crazy, sometimes boring but mostly memorable experiences. Let's see if you can relate to our girlish, tipsy and rambling thoughts.


Rule #1 - Thou Shall Look Back

You'll never guess how we came up with this rule first and what we were actually talking about at the time - flirting! Two of my friends were giving and sharing pointers on how to flirt by making eye contact with this guy that you like... down to the how long to maintain the eye contact, to the "break away" and finally... yup to the LOOK back! Then when (you) catch each other still looking then that's the sign to take the next step and perhaps smile :)

Of course this rule may not merely apply to flirting but to life in general.
For every step that you take, as you go along your merry way, it would be good of you to pause, look back and smell the flowers...

Rule #2 - Thou shall reveal your BIG SECRETS to your friends

I do believe that girls can keep a secret, especially the juicier ones and never kiss and tell... except to the other close friend within the circle and of course with permission from the main source...
Seriously though, revealing secrets takes courage from the person and a sense of trust which should be present in any friendship...
So when your friend tells you to take this secret to the grave you better do so or else!
(Blogging excluded haha)

Rule #3 - Thou shall read and watch informative materials

Another what the heck were we talking about again and you thought of this rule kinda thing...
Sometimes Dr. Phil, Oprah, Ellen or whoever is sprouting the philosophies on life and love nowadays is not only the source for that "eureka" moment, there's Cosmo, Elle, Vogue and of course the internet!

But also remember that sometimes ignorance is bliss!
Still you don't have to experience something to know what it really is... if you know what I mean

Rule #4 - To each his own... No pressure... No guarantees

A couple of my single girlfriends are single moms too so the thought of going into another relationship involve the usual complicated things and that includes being intimate with your partner, which may not be the priority for them.
For some having a relationship involves serious commitment and the intimacy and for some hooking up with the next available guy is just to assuage their need for casual sex... yup I typed "need" and it isn't a typo.
Just because your friend can go from one guy to the next and keep it casual does not mean you can do the same despite her egging you that you can do it!
The old adage show me who your friends are and I'll tell you who you are does not apply... there are different kinds of bitches out there you know :)

Rule #5 - Thou shall not enter somebody else's place 
without a personal/professional bodyguard

There's safety in numbers, right? You may not really need a bodyguard and
for sure this will be such a spoiler for those who would want to have more than just a cup of coffee and a nightcap with the guy you just met but you never really know what happens once you're in his/her turf so better prepared than sorry...
So at least check out your "escape routes" if you need a clean getaway.
Remember that the infamous Christian Grey is a fictional character and is still a person with issues despite the great suit and tie.

Rule #6 - Thou shall be with people who you can be your TRUEST self... 
whether it be good or bad...

In a circle of friends there usually is that one person who makes the stupid mistakes not only once but so often to the point that sometimes you give up on them right? Despite that you still are the perennial shoulder to cry on when they need one and they almost always need one...
Loyalty and trust are just some of the foundations of friendship of any relationship for that matter...
No judgment... Just a listening ear and yes that sturdy shoulder to cry on...

Rule #7 - Thou shall give second chances 
ONLY to those who deserve it

How do you know whether this person deserves a second chance?
You'll never know really until you take the risk and let them back into your life - in any way - may it be a chance encounter (or encounters) just simply to talk and know why or what went wrong and to have your own closure...
It's as complicated or as simple as trial and error...
Lots of bumps along the way , a lot of "wrong" second chances...
But you'll eventually get to that correct path with that one person who deserves to journey with you...

Rule #8 - To keep the one you have, 
treat them like you don't have them yet 

We used to joke that unless or until the guy is married, you can still have a go at him...
But nowadays even the ring around the finger does not stop one from grabbing his/her chance.
So hang on tight to the one you have with you now because you never really know what may happen...
As much as we would like to have forever with this guy, you still have to make the most out of each moment.




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